Tina

My husband Austin and I have been fostering children with disabilities for eight years and currently care for two young people with learning and physical difficulties.

We wanted to foster because we have always had a big family; my auntie was a foster carer, so I grew up with foster children, and my own children had friends at school who were foster children.

My own daughter grew up with learning difficulties and seeing the struggles she went through at school drove our desire to specifically foster those with disabilities.

We initially got into fostering through providing respite care for a short time. When I was made redundant, we decided to move onto foster care permanently.

The two boys we currently foster both have learning difficulties, are non-verbal, have some physical disabilities, and have the cognitive age of 18-month-olds.

We have fostered one boy for seven years now. He was our first placement, and we knew we wanted to foster him because we loved him from the first time we saw him.

We do get challenging behaviour, but it comes from frustration of not being able to communicate. Over the years we have got to know our young men and we have learnt to communicate in different ways and better understand their needs. Due to their disabilities, they were often misunderstood.

We treat and nurture our boys as we would’ve done our own children at 18 months old; we teach them how to hold a cup, we play with them.

All we want is to give these young people a chance to enjoy life.

The training from Essex County Council has been brilliant. All foster carers start with the ‘Skills to Foster’ course, but there are so many more courses that Essex County Council offer to help you help your young people.

Our social workers have always been incredible; should we need any help they are always there for us.

Another way Essex County Council can help is by providing you with respite care. Our boys live with us full time and occasionally we need a break.

We love what we do, but we still need time to ourselves and recharge our batteries which helps us and our boys in the long term. Respite care is so important for foster carers because sometimes you do need a weekend where you wake up and it’s just you in the house.

We realised we take so much for granted, and as a family we appreciate each other more because of our experiences fostering children with disabilities. Children and young people with learning or physical disabilities can’t just pop to the shops like we can, they don’t have the same life as we get to experience.

One of our boys had never been on holiday until he came to us. We take them both on holiday with us and they love it.

What we get back from fostering our two boys is so much more rewarding than the work we put in. We can see the difference we are making to their lives, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

It can be hard at times, but it’s 100 times harder for them and they don’t ask for it, they just want a normal life. They’re part of our family, they are our sons, and everyone treats them like our family.

Fostering is an amazing opportunity. All these children want is a life that they deserve. If you’re thinking about it then just go for it. These children are out of this world, they don’t ask for anything, they just need care and attention.

Join us for an informal information event where you can speak with foster carers, find out more and ask any questions.